IN HIS OWN WORDS
Creativity, self-acceptance, and the pleasure of welcoming people to the table
By Chef Lynn Wheeler
Chef Lynn Wheeler. Image supplied by the contributor; AI enhanced.
This December, I turn 50. And I welcome it. I’ve learned that life can get better—and, in some ways, easier—as you age. You stop giving quite so much weight to what other people think. You get more comfortable doing what makes you happy. I appreciate that freedom, especially knowing how far I’ve come to feel it.
Growing up gay in rural Ohio, accepting myself took time. For a brief period, I contemplated suicide. Eventually, I made a decision that changed the direction of my life: my life was worth more than my shame. That decision was an important turning point in learning to accept myself. Today, as I approach 50, I think about everything that has become part of my life since then: creativity, cooking, relationships, marriage, and the pleasure of being more comfortable with who I am.
My love of food started early. I watched my mom and granny cook, and my dad to a lesser extent. Family gatherings always revolved around food. Whatever the occasion, something to eat was part of it, and that stayed with me. I’ve always loved entertaining, too. Cooking and hosting let me bring people together, feed them, and enjoy their company. Long before it became my profession, it was something I loved doing.
But my move to New York began with a different creative ambition. After two years of fashion design school, I went there to pursue design. I did some costume design work, while also working in restaurants. Over time, my restaurant career grew. I went from waiter to manager and eventually became a chef. Looking back, there’s a familiar thread between design and cooking: I’ve always enjoyed making things and bringing an idea to life.
Along the way, I started Divalicious Catering. Its beginning was personal: providing food for a friend’s wedding reception. Something I already loved—cooking for people and helping them celebrate—became a business.
Relationships have expanded my world of food as well. My introduction to Filipino food came through the first of three Filipino boyfriends. The third became my husband. Filipino food now holds a particularly special place in my life, alongside my love of cuisines from all over the world. I’m curious about what people cook, how they prepare it, and what they love to eat. There’s always another flavor to explore or a dish I want to learn to make. That curiosity keeps cooking exciting for me.
Today, I share that excitement through my YouTube channel, “Getting Saucy With Chef Lynn.” It gives me another way to cook for people, even if we aren’t in the same room. I can share what I know, experiment, and bring my personality into the kitchen. When I say, “Hey, Foodie Friends!” I’m extending a welcome. It comes from the same part of me that has always loved having people over and making sure there’s something delicious to share.
One of my favorite dishes for entertaining is lobster fondue. An old friend introduced me to the original recipe, and after making it for a few years, I made it my own with fresh vegetables, goat cheese, and white wine. I haven’t made it in a while, but it remains a favorite—and it’s especially lovely for a holiday gathering.
I still have plenty I want to create, learn, and share. Turning 50 makes me excited about what comes next. I’m grateful for the life my husband and I share, and I’m increasingly comfortable choosing the things that make me happy. For anyone still finding their way toward self-acceptance, I can only speak from my own experience: there was so much life ahead of me that I couldn’t yet see. I’m glad I gave myself the chance to live it.
So I’m welcoming 50. I plan to keep cooking, entertaining, exploring, and enjoying the person I’ve become. And, of course, getting saucy.
Tuna tartare with caviar, sesame seeds, and plantain chips. Dish and photography by Chef Lynn Wheeler.
FROM MY KITCHEN
Lobster Fondue
By Chef Lynn Wheeler
Serves 10 as an appetizer
Gathering people around something delicious has always been one of my favorite things to do. This rich, creamy lobster fondue is a favorite for entertaining and feels especially at home during the holidays. Serve it with assorted breads, crackers, or hard pretzels, and invite everyone to help themselves.
Ingredients
Cooked meat from one 2-pound lobster, chopped
2 medium shallots, minced
4 plum tomatoes, seeded and finely diced
2 jalapeños, seeds and ribs removed, finely diced (optional)
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 tablespoons olive oil
8 ounces cream cheese, at room temperature
8 ounces goat cheese, at room temperature
8 ounces pepper jack cheese, grated
1 cup dry white wine
3 tablespoons chopped fresh chives, plus more for garnish
2–3 tablespoons heavy cream, as needed
Salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste
Assorted breads, toast, crackers, or hard pretzels, for serving
Method
1. Heat the olive oil in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Add the shallots and garlic with a little salt and pepper. Sauté for 2–3 minutes, until slightly softened.
2. Add the tomatoes and jalapeños, if using. Sauté for another 2 minutes.
3. Pour in the white wine and simmer until reduced to approximately â…“ cup.
4. Reduce the heat to low. Stir in the cream cheese and goat cheese until completely melted and smooth.
5. Gradually stir in the pepper jack until melted.
6. Fold in the chopped lobster and 3 tablespoons of chives. Heat gently until warmed through.
7. Add the heavy cream, 1 tablespoon at a time, if needed to loosen the fondue. Taste and adjust the salt and pepper.
8. Transfer to a fondue pot or slow cooker to keep warm, or serve in individual ramekins. Garnish with additional chives and serve with your favorite dippers.
Find more recipes at cheflynnwheeler.com and watch “Getting Saucy With Chef Lynn” on YouTube.
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